another day here, another day forgotten.   Some days I just don't know what I'm going to do with myself. It's almost as if my life is one of those tales where every day you wake up and its the same day over again.  Everyday different descisions lead to different results. Sort of a broken record effect. Then again it sometimes seems just like some sort of a practice for something.  You know, no matter how annoying it gets, you just have to keep doing it over and over again until you get it right. 

The Lord will guide you always; He will satisfy your needs and will strengthen your frame.

Ever feel like you're the only thing holding everyone else together, even though really, you're falling apart.  I feel like that a lot.

What am I missing?

So I haven't been around much lately....in case you didn't know, I resigned my position at Woodlawn a couple months ago.  The circumstances that surrounded it has left me hurting on the inside sinse then.  Honestly I've ignored it for the most part, only loosing it every once in a while.  Tonight was my first time back to church since then.  I had doubts within me, fears.  But God showed me His sovereignty.  As soon as the worship time began He took me to Psalms, chapter 109.  By the end of the first passage I lost it, I tried my best to hide it from those around me but I continued to weep silently, uncontrollably throughout the worship time.  The entire passage spoke to me, brought out all the feelings I had hidden deeply inside me.  God then continued to speak with me throughout the service, taking me through the passages about the church as a body and the passage about casting the nets to the other side of the boat.  All of it spoke to me so clearly and lifted me.  I'm still confused about a lot of things, but God has assured me that He is sovereign. 

It seems to be one of those things people are afraid of doing, but a few months ago I asked God to go full speed ahead in me, I asked Him to mold me, no matter how much it hurt, as quickly as he could.  Now in this clearity I see how everything has been an answer to that prayer.  I still can't tell you where He is taking me and there are still lots of things that just don't make sense, butI'm anxious to get where He wants me to be. 

Well, this was just to update those who have been concerned about me.  I'll let you know more when I can.  But for now I've gotta get back to the Father.

Much Love

Daryl